“Why is my body doing this to me?”
Have you ever found yourself asking this question during times of physical distress?
If you answered yes, you’re not alone.
Living in a society that often views the body as a machine made up of separate parts that need to be “fixed” when something goes awry leads us to believe we’re separate from our bodies in some way, shape or form, and that we have no direct connection with them.
This can lead us to living a life wrapped up in our heads rather than being in our bodies.
When we’re living life separated from our bodies, we often feel our bodies are doing something to us rather than working with and for us — leaving little room to learn what they’re trying to tell us.
What if there was a different way of relating to our bodies? Start by reframing the original question to…
“What is my body trying to tell me?”
“What is this discomfort trying to teach me?”
“What can I learn from my body?”
By approaching our bodies as one of our greatest teachers, rather than an enemy out to get us, we can develop a healthier way of relating and ultimately caring for it.
To help in our quest to better the relationship with our body, let’s begin by viewing it as a metaphor for the mind. Whatever is going on inside of us mentally, emotionally and/or spiritually is reflected in the state of how we are feeling physically.
You know the saying, “body, mind and spirit?” From my experience as a bodyworker over the years, I’ve come to work with a physical system in the body where the body, mind and spirit meet. I’m referring to the full-body, 3 dimensional web of connective tissue that embeds everything from the largest muscle group down to the tiniest cell. This 3 dimensional web is called the fascia.
The fascial system is not only the physical entity in our bodies that can store tension patterns due to physical distress, it is also a meeting place for the body, mind and spirit; meaning whatever trauma we have experienced in our lives, whether physical or emotional trauma, that wasn’t fully experienced at the onset, can get stored in the fascial system.
If left unaddressed, this storing of unprocessed experience can manifest as patterns of tension, pain and discomfort in our bodies.
Let me give you an example:
Have you ever experienced a ‘punch to the gut’ type of circumstance when you were caught off guard with unexpected news or heartbreak? If so, did you allow the feelings associated with the experience to move through you after the shock wore off? Or did you swallow what you felt? Was it a combination of these two? Or was it a different experience altogether?
There’s no right or wrong answer. At the same time, if any emotion related to what you experienced wasn’t fully expressed through you with either tears, letting out anger by screaming into a pillow for example, writing it out in your journal or through some other medium; the unprocessed emotional energy could be living in your tissues accumulating and creating patterns of tension or discomfort.
Not every body stores trauma in the same location. Unprocessed heartbreak is oftentimes stored in the chest region that surrounds the heart and lungs, while an unexpected blow to our sense of self can be stored in the solar plexus region (just below the rib cage and sternum), feelings of bewilderment can be stored in the digestive system or the cranium and many more possibilities.
Wherever the trauma is stored, releasing the fascia of this tension helps put you on a path towards full body healing. In myofascial release, the fascia is manipulated, by either deep, slow stretching or structural myofascial release techniques. The fascia then has an opportunity to release these holding patterns and the original trauma/s that created them.
If you don’t know any techniques to help self-treat the fascia, and/or you’re not able to see someone for a treatment right away, what do you do?!
Below are a few suggestions to help you cultivate a relationship with your body, and your fascia, and better understand what may ail you, by helping you drop out of your head and down into your body.
These techniques can be practiced in any order. Simply choose the ones that resonate with you.
Please note, these keys are not medical advice. This guidance is purely offered to act as an enhancement on your road to health.
1.Feel your feet
One of the quickest ways to drop out of your head and down into your body is to “feel your feet” and the surface underneath. The feet are the direct connector with the earth beneath you, and when you shift your attention to how your feet feel standing, moving or resting upon the surface that’s underneath them, you come into the present moment and plug into your physical being.
Now, pause for a moment and plant your feet on the ground. Close your eyes. Breathe. Feel your feet resting upon the surface beneath them. What did you notice?
2. Pay attention to your breath
Breath is life. Oftentimes when feeling stressed or fully immersed in thought, there’s a tendency to breathe shallowly. Shallow breath can constrict the diaphragm and create tension in the chest and neck. When you allow yourself to notice the quality of your breath, you then become more aware of how you physically feel.
Pause again. Breathe in counting to three. Then exhale out counting to three. Repeat this a few times and pay attention to how the breath feels moving in and out of your body. Notice anything?
3. Breathe into the sensation
Take your breathing a step further. Once you become aware of the sensations in your body, if not too painful, allow yourself to be with and breathe into what you feel. Sometimes the physical sensations feel more intense when the discomfort that is there is ignored. When the discomfort is allowed to be there and you breathe through it, sometimes it can either ease up or dissipate altogether.
Take another pause and tune into a part of your body that feels tension. Close your eyes and imagine as you breathe in, the oxygen you’re taking in traveling to that tense region. Imagine the oxygen softening and loosening this tissue. As you breathe out, allow any tension to leave your body through your breath. Repeat this breathwork and visualization a few times, and see if you notice any changes in how you feel.
4. Drop in and listen to your body
Once space is allowed for the physical sensations to be there, and when you breathe with them, give yourself some time to listen to what your body is trying to tell you. One suggestion is to either mentally or verbally ask, “what do you want me to know?” Or “what do you need from me?”
Then sit back and listen.
You may or may not get an answer right away. Just be patient when you start this active dialogue.
When answers start to arrive, they may come in the form of a vision, a dream while sleeping, a thought or the like.
Be open to how your body communicates with you.
The more you listen, and follow through on the messages your body shares, your connection with your body and intuition will deepen.
5. Follow your body’s lead
After you connect with your body’s messages, follow its lead.
All too often the mind tells the body what it wants it to do, even when it’s not in it’s best interest. Instead, follow your body’s lead and pay attention to how you feel when you engage in activities or experiences it requests.
For example, your body may be telling you to be more active by going outside for a walk, or to rest more by sleeping longer each night. It may even want you to seek outside help (such as bodywork, checking in with your doctor, or working with a personal trainer) or a plethora of other requests.
Listen and follow.
6. Be open to change
The messages your body sends may require you to change some habits, which can be uncomfortable at first. The more open you are to change, the easier it will be to implement what is being asked of you.
7. Consistency is key
The more you practice something, the more it becomes second nature and the deeper your experience will be. By increasingly practicing any or all of these suggestions, you allow for the relationship with your body to deepen and the possibility to feel better as a result.
I know that there are circumstances beyond your control that may bring injury to your physical being, and practicing some of these suggestions may be unthinkable at first. If you find yourself healing from a trauma like this, I encourage you to gently play with some of these suggestions, when you feel safe to do so, and discover how they may enhance your recovery.
When you take time to consciously reframe your relationship with your body, it is possible to befriend it.